Why I Hide

Today is Thursday, Day 107 in Bahrain, day 72 of The Isolation Journals with Suleika Jaouad and my 37th wedding anniversary. Today’s prompt was based on a quote from Nehru, the first prime minister of India.

It is no easy matter to decide what is right and what is not. One little test I shall ask you to apply whenever you are in doubt…Never do anything in secret or anything that you would wish to hide. For the desire to hide anything means that you are afraid, and fear is a bad thing and unworthy of you. Be brave, and all the rest follows.
—October 26, 1930, from Naini Central Prison in Uttar Pradesh, India

Our prompt…”Where does the impulse to hide our stories come from? How is this connected to what you fear—and why?”

Is it self-preservation that keeps me from sharing all my stories? There are definitely stories I don’t share and never have shared with others. I guess the fear is shame and humiliation, but is what Nehru said true? If I am brave, all the rest follows? What if I did tell all my stories as needed in the moment, without fear of being rejected, shamed or humiliated? Perhaps my stories would help someone else overcome their fears.

Suleika keeps this quote on her desk, “If you want to write a good book, write what you don’t want people to know about you. If you want to write a GREAT book, write what you don’t want to know about yourself.”

And that is my food for today. I’m going to go and nibble at this as I get ready for bed.

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