Mary Lee Hahn, whose sweet Twitter profile says, “5th grade teacher, reader, blogger, poet-in-training,” is retiring. Congratulations, Mary Lee! Thank you for all the beautiful poetry “training” you share publicly. Children and teachers alike have been blessed with your learning, writing, and teaching through poetry.
Recently Mary Lee wrote an onomatopoeia poem called “Sleigh Ride.” Here is the first stanza:
shhh
say the runners
sliding through the snow
It is a great form for using as a mentor to write about the sounds in a setting, so I share this poem in honor of Mary Lee; I wrote it today while my husband tinkered and made noise in the kitchen.
Keith Makes Healthy Pudding
Whoosh, pop
Says the refrigerator door
Opening for ingredients sweet
Burble, splish, splash
Says the water
Cascading over coming treats
Rattle, clash, grind, hum
Says the blender
Pulverizing nuts and berries
Rap, tap, clackety clack
Says the stainless steel dish
Filling with the dessert it carries
Slurp, yum, delicious
Says watching-and-listening me,
Fortuitous beneficiary
All the best to you, Mary Lee, in your retirement. Of course, I know you will continue your poetry training, writing and sharing, as the lifelong learner, creator and contributor that you are. Here are Mary Lee’s blogs: A Year of Reading and Poetrepository.
Thank you to Christie Wyman for hosting Poetry Friday today, a party honoring Mary Lee Hahn, at her Wondering and Wandering blog. And happy birthday to you today, Christie!
I’m a big fan of onomatopoeia. Fun to hear the sounds of your husband in the kitchen. Gotta love men who cook.
Thank you, Margaret. I haven’t done much with onomatopoeia, so it was a challenge I’d like to explore some more in the future.
“Fortuitous beneficiary” is a great (and accurate) ending! Love the form, too.
Thank you, Tabatha. It was fortuitous. He often makes things and surprises me with them. They are usually winners!
Your poem is “Slurp, yum, delicious”, Denise! I’m interested in what constitutes ‘healthy pudding’, too! I’d love your husband’s recipe. đŸ™‚
Bridget, thanks for the comment. While he was working I was paying attention to the sounds, having decided that those were the sounds I was hearing and outside it seemed too hot for even the birds. I guess while I wrote the poem I wasn’t exactly getting it right, but here is what he tells me…
First there is some cashew cream (a handful of cashews soaked in water and blended up into a cream). Then some overripe bananas (two small ones), plus a scoop of silken tofu. Last he folded in whole blueberries. It was thick and creamy and delicious, but not really that cold as it could have been if he started with frozen bananas (which may have been better–next time and more like soft serve ice cream)
The onomatopoeia makes this such a sensory poem! What a wonderful tribute to Mary Lee and her contribution to the worlds of education and poetry.
Thank you so much, Elisabeth. As I’ve seen other say today about Mary Lee, her love and learning and poetry will continue to spread long after her retirement.
Now I’m oddly hungry…
I love the sounds of fulfilling those needs via cooking!
Thank you, Tanita. Yes! I like the sound from the kitchen too. I always look forward to my husband’s concoctions.
Thanks for sharing how Mary Lee’s onomatopoeia poem inspired one of your own, Denise!
Thanks, Lauren. It is always delightful to experiment with others’ poems and try their forms.
Onomatopoeia is such fun – and really gets the poet tuned into their surrounds, noticing unexpected things with all the senses. (Pretty sure the sense of taste was ready for it’s chance to shine, by the end of this!)
Oops. That was me. I accidentally posted before I’d filled out my details.
Yes, Kathryn, so true. I found myself standing at the refrigerator door, opening and closing, listening to what it was saying. I couldn’t find the right words for the release of that vacuum suction, though.
So many of my poems have come as a result of writing alongside Mary Lee! Yours is absolutely delicious!
Carol, I like that “writing alongside…” Thank you!
I think your post now will inspire me to listen when I create in the kitchen, Denise! What fun to write a poem for Mary Lee after her own onomatopoeic poem. I love all the sounds you used!
Thank you, Linda. Yes, I’ve been more tuned into sounds all day, as well. Trying to find words for the sounds I hear. How do poets and authors find the right words? It is a fun exercise.
I love the title of your poem and how ordinary the activity is with all those luscious onomatopoeiae! I have a clipboard at school that I painted black and mod-podged onomatopoeiae all over cut out of old graphic novels. They are fun words! And, I can engage a kid or two every once in a while.
I had a hard time getting to your blog from the link in the round-up. But, others didn’t. Hmmmm. I guess I’ll just have to subscribe to keep up with your writing.
Linda,
The black wall with cartoony POWs, etc. sounds so fun!
Thanks for persisting! The link widget doesn’t work for me on Friday’s either! (When I click on my own post–all the others are fine!)
What fun this is, Denise! I especially love the ending:
… watching-and-listening me,
Fortuitous beneficiary
My husband makes plenty of noise in the kitchen (and deliciousness too), so I can relate. đŸ™‚
Thank you, Karen! Hooray for husbands in the kitchen!
What a fun poem, love all the kitchen sounds! The ending made me smile — the best part is enjoying what someone else has made! đŸ™‚
Thank you, Jama, for stopping by. Yes, I’m paying more attention to sounds since that exercise yesterday. I agree, I love when someone else cooks and surprises me with the creation.
Denise, I read your post a couple of days ago and then went to open it but could not figure out how to comment. The redirect did not work but here I am today with thoughts. I love the use of onomatopoeia in a poem. Your poem strikes a cord with me-bringing me back to high school writing when sounds popped in my head. You took the ordinary and made it a delicious treat through sound words like “Slurp, yum, delicious.”
Thank you, Carol, for persisting and reading and responding. I’ve noticed the link widget seems to work inconsistently for me.
I’m glad my poem brought up a writing memory for you.
I love your poem, and I love that you were inspired by Mary Lee. She has had that effect on so many of us!
Thank you, Ruth! Yes, I have not had the pleasure of knowing Mary Lee for long, so it was really fun to read all the tributes last Friday!
You sure have used some delicious words in that poem of yours, Denise! They make the best ingredients. đŸ™‚ I’m wondering if now that Mary Lee is retiring from teaching, the “in-training” part of her poet title will be coming off. Seems to me, even “real” poets are still in training. It comes with the territory. We’re all lifelong learners.
Yes, Michelle. I believe the ones who know they are the chief learners in life train harder and go further. Thank you for reading and commenting.
My poem was ekphrastic, so with only the sounds I could imagine. I love yours, with the sounds you actually heard! I was right there in the kitchen with you (I, too, am blessed with a hubby who cooks and bakes). YUM, and thanks!
I am enjoying getting to know you through Poetry Friday. I love how you lift challenges from so many bloggers/posts. I’m looking forward to being able to write like that, too!
(PS–thanks for reminding me that I need to change my profiles!)
I went back and read your poem again seeing how you wrote it based on the artwork. That is a great exercise too–imagining only the sounds. Thank you so much for responding here. I’m really glad you can enjoy the next chapter with more writing, fun, and learning and all the things you’ve been wanting to do more of!