Keith and I planted a barrel cactus this week. Last year I planted that blue agave in the background.
Now my sister has brought over some clippings from other cacti. This evening, in the coolness and shade, I will plant these pieces and then trim the area with rocks to make a little cactus garden. More photos later.
Another thing on my mind this week is kindness and what it really means. See chapter 2 of White Women: Everything You Already Know About Your Own Racism and How to Do Better for more.
Kindness vs. Niceness
“Your nice is actually evil,”
Saira and Regina say,
“Kindness…is a killer to your niceness.”
Most of my life I haven’t considered
the two as being contrary–
though I do know the fruit of the Spirit
is love, joy, peace,
patience, kindness, goodness,
faithfulness, gentleness, self-control
No mention of nice, nicer, nicest,
niceness, niceties, overnice…
One of my mother’s stated goals for all
her seven kids was that we would be nice.
A lifetime has brought me here, for
I became a nice success.
Now I find myself with further
unlearning to do.
So much of my niceness is driven by fear–
fear of standing out
fear of sitting in
fear of disappointing others
fear of making waves
fear of not being liked
fear of lacking strength
fear of fear of fear
to be, to do, to say the kind thing
sometimes kindness isn’t nice
always kindness isn’t easy
fear doesn’t have to be the winner
I just went outside and finished step 1. The rocks are a bigger deal. Maybe tomorrow.