We had just been married a few weeks. Keith was on a camping trip with the youth group. On Friday morning, my only day off of the campout, I drove the two-hour trip to enjoy the day with them at the state park.
It had rained the night before, and everything was damp. We spent part of the day dealing with wet camping gear, but also swimming, hiking and other fun.
When dinner time approached, my husband tried to start a campfire for the hotdogs and s’mores. He had a metal can of Kingsford Charcoal Lighter Fluid, the kind you squeeze onto the wood. He tried to start a fire with this damp wood and kindling, throwing matches on that would not fully catch on fire. He doused it some more, then threw another match.
The lit match-squirt pattern continued until finally the fire took hold and shot up during the squirt phase. Our previously non-existent fire leapt from the ground up to become a flame thrower’s masterpiece–a flaming river flowing up from the ground. He instinctively threw the flaming bottle up and out of his hand. “We’re all gonna die!” he yelled. In that split second he pictured the metal can had sucked the fire into the fuel and became a bomb ready to explode (as we had seen on recent news warnings).
Being the brave fool I was, I grabbed not a handful of dirt, but someone’s sleeping bag that had been drying on a makeshift clothesline. I smothered the fire, which had spread out of the fire ring.
I don’t recall where or if it was spreading really; it was damp there in this forest and obviously not a fire tinder box ready to create a forest fire. Fortunately the charcoal fluid bomb fizzled, but the scorched and ruined sleeping bag now needed to be replaced. So, instead of sitting around the campfire, I drove to Target in the nearest town and bought a new sleeping bag so the teenager could sleep that night.
Fast forward 38 years. Last week was our anniversary, and we reminisced about some early memories, this one included. At the time he yelled “We’re all gonna die!” I wondered what I had gotten myself into. He may have wondered about me too.
Today Keith is known in meetings and groups as the non-anxious presence–a wise leader, looked to for surety and strength.
It’s good to not look too soon for the final person another will become–this wisdom is not just for children, but for partners, as well. Thanks be to God that we have hung onto each other through all kinds of exposing behaviors, and I am so grateful.
Inspiration today was from The Isolation Journals, Prompt 151, by Ashley C. Ford taken from a portion of her memoir Somebody’s Daughter, which is a beautiful memoir and this month’s Book Club Pick.
“Think of a memory related to fire. How did it impact you then? What meaning do you forge from it now?”
Ah, memories! They can be quite traumatic, embarrassing, etc. in the moment but bring a smile later in life. This is a wonderful story. I love the way you show the passage of time and the lessons to be learned:
“Today Keith is known in meetings and groups as the non-anxious presence–a wise leader, looked to for surety and strength.
It’s good to not look too soon for the final person another will become–this wisdom is not just for children, but for partners, as well.”
I think this is a powerful way to close your post. Thank you for sharing this memory with all of us!
Thank you, Tracy. Yes, it is definitely good to reflect on earlier life experiences and what we learn from them. Those traumatic and embarrassing ones especially are good to remember and reflect so we don’t have to relive and repeat them.
Such a gripping yet entertaining story, Denise! Thank heaven for your long-ago instinct and quick action. There’s humor in imagining the worst but not at the time (how well you paint the horror of potential conflagration with the whoosh of fire, the gas can…) This line really strike home with me: “It’s good to not look too soon for the final person another will become.” So true, as we are all in the process of becoming… and it speaks to me of one of my favorite themes, redemption.
Ah, yes, redemption! Thank you, Fran. Oh, the stories that would have undone me if there had been social media capturing my faux pas in my youth. It is a blessing when we are allowed to grow. Our current culture seems to categorize people into two categories–the good and the unredeemable. I want to keep choosing redemption for myself and others. Thank you!
Denise, your tale is one of suspense and quick action. How well you led us through the event and captured the essence of long-standing marriage. “Thanks be to God that we have hung onto each other through all kinds of exposing behaviors.”
Thank you, Carol. Those words are very encouraging. I love that “essence of long-standing marriage.”
A moment of terror will bring out anything. As you put it, exposing behaviors. After 38 years, I’m sure you have both had your share. I love how memories like this get to live on though, through reminiscing and storytelling. A silly incident (almost serious) turns into a reminder of hanging in there and waiting for what’s next to come.
Yes, Betsy, having all those incidents over our lives does make us hang in there all the more.